I bet you didn’t know that this whole time, I’ve been living with Wonder Woman and Spider Man. Yes, I’ve kept it to myself this whole time, but now it’s time to share. It’s a good thing my parents don’t have social media, much less know how to use it or understand how it works, because they would probably freak out if they knew I was sharing this. We all go through stages in our lives where we face certain limitations that never used to be a problem but suddenly have become an issue in some way, shape, or form. I’ve learned this not only through myself but also through my elderly parents. I hear them say they have always been able to do this or that without help. Now, it’s become apparent to them and me that they do, in fact, need help with sometimes the simplest things. In their minds, they can do anything and everything, and it’s business as usual, but unfortunately, their bodies beg to differ. My job is to be an extension of their arms and legs and help with anything I can. If they are outside in the backyard and I’m home, I’m constantly looking to see where they are and what they are doing. First of all, I’m making sure my mom has her walker and that she is actually using it. She enjoys tending to her plants, watering the yard, feeding the birds, and filling the bird bath. I’ll position the water hose where she can sit on her walker and water what she needs. My dad is pretty independent and usually does yard work like trimming, digging up weeds, and blowing leaves. He has trouble at times with his own mobility but doesn’t want to use a cane or walker. I have to keep an eye on him, too, because, at times, it’s difficult for him to lift his legs when he’s walking, and he has balance issues, too. He’s unable to do so much physical yard work or landscaping anymore, which, thankfully, my brother helps with this once a week. More times than not, my dad is straightening and shredding papers in his work shed that we call the “Cuatito.” With my mom, I can often predict what she’s thinking of doing, and I’ll try to beat her to it if I see that it will be too much for her physically to do. If anything, I try to compromise with her and still let her do what she wants, but I will be there to help. Again, this is all on the basis that I’m actually home. When I’m not home, well, that’s another story because there’s no telling what trouble they can get into!
I’ve mentioned to my parents that the time may come when we will need to look into getting help with those tasks that they can’t do anymore but they aren’t quite ready to entertain that thought yet. I can understand when you feel like you’re losing your independence you feel like you’re losing a bit of yourself. I get that because my situation of not being able to drive can be frustrating. I can’t just pick up and go when I want to. It’s a whole process of scheduling transportation, how much is it going to cost me and I’m dependent on someone else’s time. I don’t like it but it’s my only choice. With my parent’s it’s the same concept in that they too can’t just pick up and go when they want to because my dad can’t drive very far from the house anymore and if it’s raining, he really won’t want to drive even if it’s close to the house. I have to utilize other transportation options for them too. Driving is part of my dad’s independence which is slowly coming to an end. The independence of working on the house and doing little maintenance projects like he was used to doing is no longer an option for him. I know this bothers him and I don’t blame him.
You won’t believe this, but they do have their moments when all of a sudden a change takes place and they take on the personas of Wonder Woman & Spider Man. Yes, I have witnessed this firsthand! One example of this happened recently after I got home from work. I walked in the door and I see my mom sitting down in her recliner I could tell right away something was wrong. She didn’t look like she was feeling well and also had a guilty look on her face so I knew right away something happened. She had fought a battle and came out a little bruised. She had been sitting down at the table in the backyard reading, taking in the beauty of the sunny day, and enjoying the sounds of the birds. Then suddenly, she has the urge to repot one of her plants. She had been planning this mission for a while but wouldn’t share the specifics with me as far as what, when, how, and where. It was on a “need to know” basis. So, here she goes making her way to the fence, and starts digging a hole (don’t think the thought of the position of the walker in relation to her was in the plan). Next thing you know, something is taking over her body and it slowly takes her down to the ground. Well, let me back up and say that she was bent over from the beginning so that didn’t help her cause. So now she’s on the ground and contemplating how she’s going to get up. Dad on the other hand was busy in his cuatito doing his own thing and he’s hard of hearing so he probably wouldn’t have heard her crying out for help. That’s a whole other story for another post! To continue, she’s trying to work up another plan of how to get up from the ground. Thank God the fence was there and somehow she managed to reach up and slowly get up. It took a while, but she did it and it also came with a price. Yes, a price of a cut on the inside of her hand, sore neck and muscles, and plenty of heat patches and Icy Hot. I know you’re wondering….what was the outcome of the task she was in the middle of when this unfortunate mishap occurred? Mission Accomplished! Yes, she is Wonder Woman!
Just when you think the story has ended, there’s more. So, rewind back to when I arrived home from work and I see my mom and she’s detailing her battle from the day. I walk to the backdoor and look outside and ask where dad is. As I mentioned earlier, dad is very independent when it comes to being outside doing his tasks. He’s a very quiet man and keeps to himself. He’s always thinking always planning and he doesn’t share. He keeps it all inside and when he’s ready to share what’s on his mind, watch out! So back to the story, as I’m asking where dad is I’m looking out the window only to see Spider Man in the cuatito with one leg on a table and the other on the ladder holding a big object in his hands. I’m in the middle of WTF and running to the cuatito to witness this firsthand! I run in and again WTF and attempt to take on the burden of this heavy object (big heavy luggage) that is about to overtake him. Actually, this object was about to take us both out but suddenly my own Wonder Woman strength kicks in and saves the day! Spider-Man has been spared as well! Just like my mom, my dad’s day started just as innocently. He was also enjoying his day outside listening to his music on cassette tapes (yes, my dad still has a tape player and cassette tapes), moving things in his shed from one place to another, organizing, sweeping, etc. Then suddenly, something catches his eye and he gets inspired to hang the heaviest object up on the wall while hanging from one leg on the ladder. Oh, Spider-Man what were you thinking!
Living with Wonder Woman and Spider Man can be enlightening, entertaining, challenging, frustrating, mind-boggling, and physically and mentally demanding. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful they still have that fight inside to keep moving (even though it’s a lot slower) despite their physical limitations. I wouldn’t want it any other way. It’s a fine balance between respecting them to let them do what they want to do but not to the point where they can hurt themselves. I take it one day at a time and I’ve learned to be prepared because I never know what journey these two are going to take me on!
The World of Dlo 