The feeling of being unable to breathe is an instance in life when we can feel like we are suffocating, drowning, and trapped. I have had too many instances where I have experienced this throughout my life. I especially experienced this before I moved from Texas to Colorado where I felt unfulfilled and unhappy both personally and professionally. I could not breathe, and I felt claustrophobic until an unexpected opportunity was presented to me to move to Colorado and without even thinking about it I just did it. That was so unlike me, and I had never done anything like that before, but I was so desperate that I did not think twice. I just jumped and I never looked back. I resided in Colorado for 20 years until I could not breathe again to the point where my life was draining out of me.
The beginning of January 2017 involved the culmination of events that led to my decision to choose life over death. The first week of the year involved me passing out at work. I had many ongoing medical issues that were just accumulating and getting worse until my body could not take it anymore. This was an obvious sign that I needed to take a step back from work because this was one of the biggest causes of stress in my life and it was affecting my health. Little did I know that a step back was eventually going to be me resigning from my 11-year employment at the Summit County Sheriff’s Office. That was one of the toughest decisions I have ever had to make. It was hard but I knew that this time I had to choose my life over the job.
In early Spring 2017, my Cardiologist put me on oxygen due to the temporary drop in oxygen saturation I experienced during sleep. I had to use oxygen while I slept which was annoying. I had the big oxygen tank with the extra-long oxygen tubes and the whole nine yards. I did not realize that my oxygen levels went down while I slept but it was low enough for me to be on oxygen. After starting the oxygen, I started getting nosebleeds. I had never had nosebleeds before. Now when I say nosebleeds, it was more like a waterfall coming out of my nose that would not stop, and nothing I would do like what they suggested leaning my head back and pinching my nose never worked because I would choke on my own blood if I leaned my head back. These episodes were a situation that immediately became serious because I have Secondary Adrenal Insufficiency. As a result, my body does not produce Cortisol which is the stress hormone. One of Cortisol’s most important jobs is to help our bodies respond to any type of stress including illness, emotional or physical stresses, injury, or trauma increasing cortisol production up to ten times the normal amount. During any type of emergency, we must receive an immediate injection of steroids, or our bodies will go into adrenal crisis, causing coma or heart failure and eventually death. Without proper and immediate treatment an adrenal crisis can become fatal. I must have my emergency kit on hand at all times which contains a vial of Solu-Cortef (Hydrocortisone) 100mg which needs to be administered intramuscularly in addition to going to the ER.
During this situation with my nosebleed, I was unable to give myself the injection due to me trying to keep myself leaning over the kitchen or bathroom sink to avoid blood going all over everything. I had no choice but to wait until EMS arrived for them to administer the injection. I had to do my best to keep myself calm and awake because I could feel life draining out of me. They administered the injection and transported me to the ER. The ER Physician took care of the bleeding and then released me. At this point, it was 4am or 5am in the morning, and I did not have a way to get home. Summit County had just started getting Uber/Lyft in our area, but they were not around that early in the morning. The free bus transportation was available but out of the question because I was having issues walking much less walking long distances. Thankfully, one of the EMTs that had brought me in the ambulance said they would give me a ride home. I believe the reason he offered was because he knew I worked for the Sheriff’s Office.
Once I got home, I attempted to rest and get some sleep then suddenly I started getting another nosebleed. The last thing I remember doing was going to my kitchen and I picked up the phone, dialed 911, and just said help and I laid down on the floor. That was all I remember because I lost consciousness. Luckily, one of the Sheriff’s Deputies happened to be in the area and came to the rescue. After the EMTs administered the emergency injection, I came to and found myself in the back of the ambulance and I remember crying and saying aloud that I was done, tired and over this and wanted my life to be over. The two ambulance techs that were on either side of me at the end of the stretcher were talking to each other and I realized that at that moment they were too involved in their own conversation they were not paying attention to me or hearing what I said. That was a good thing otherwise they would have placed a M1 hold on me and that would have caused a whole different outcome in this situation that would not have been ideal for me. The good thing about this trip to the ER was the ER Physician cauterized one of the blood vessels in my nose and that resolved the problem. From that point on, I had to use a face mask instead of the nasal cannulas and add a humidifier to the oxygen tank.
Throughout the rest of the year, at every turn, I was hitting all these obstacles of health issues from my heart and blood pressure, issues with debilitating muscular pain in my legs and arms, my disease, my medications, etc. I could not win no matter what I did. In August 2017, I made my decision to resign from the Sheriff’s Office. As mentioned before, it was one of the toughest decisions but also one of the best decisions. I could not physically work a full-time job but wanted to find something part-time. Luckily for me, I found a part-time job at a Wellness Spa that was a positive change and no stress. Then a few months later, I received a call from the Dillon Police Department and had the opportunity to help them out part-time until they found a full-time person until the end of the year. I ended my employment with Wellness Spa to pursue a position at the Dillon Police Department. After my temporary position at the Dillon Police Department ended, I was unemployed at the start of 2018. In my job search, I found a part-time job 10-15 hours a week at an Oil & Gas company that was an Administrative Assistant position that was chill and easy. I absolutely loved it. I also located another job working at an Appliance Repair company two days a week from home that consisted of Administrative Assistant duties, Receptionist, and Scheduling appointments. It was perfect because I had always dreamed of working from home. I continued to work both part-time jobs but I was still battling my health issues and they were only getting worse.
By the Spring of 2018, I knew that I had to make another life-altering decision. I was experiencing those same feelings as I did before I left Texas unfulfilled, unhappy, and defeated, but this time my life was hanging in the balance. In March 2018, I came to visit my mom for her birthday, and during my visit, I could feel something inside of me telling me that I needed to move back home not only for my health but to take care of my parents. I needed to get my life and health in order because I had a purpose now. This is one of the few times in my life where I felt confident this was a decision that I needed to make and put into motion as soon as possible. I did not mention anything to my family at this point because I did not know the specifics of how, who, what, or where. I was just focused on getting back to Colorado so I could set my plans into motion. When I spoke to my landlord, I had to give him a date that I would be out of the apartment. For some reason, the date of July 1st was the date I had in my mind that I would be in Texas. I told him I would be out of the apartment at the end of June. Once I started on my list of tasks, things started falling into place with first using the UPS Store to ship my belongings to my parent’s house. I also sold my furniture, so I did not have to worry about how I was going to have those transported. My landlord found someone to lease my apartment which happened to be one of my friend’s mother-in-law. I managed to take care of everything I needed before moving and my last day in Colorado was June 28th. On June 28, 2018, I suddenly started to feel like I could breathe again.
The World of Dlo 